Lean on me

Mornings with Murphy.  For some reason after her walk, breakfast, and toast, she spends a couple hours being anxious.  She wanders the house, from kitchen, living room, study.  If I am working at my desk, she will crawl underneath, causing me a slight panic over the 50 million computer cords I have down there.  

I suspect she is feeling some morning pain.  You know, like we all feel?  My sore right foot, the hip that has a slight hitch.  They act up in the morning, after a night of being still.  And Murphy, who is such a phenomenal athlete, maybe wondering why she just doesn't feel all that good.  Plus, there is the issue of senility.  It's hard for me to think she is anxious because of that.  But, there it is.

Years ago she somehow bruised her back, a contusion on her spine.  I got up, ready to run, and she met me on the stairs, shaking, shivering.  She was clearly scared.  Panicked, I got her to the vet early, where they kept her all day.  In the afternoon Nancy called and said it was a bruise.  The usual admonishment with labs: keep her quiet for a few days.  Yeah, right.

So now, I think her wandering, her inability to quiet down, is the same as her shivering.  She is scared that her body is changing, and she doesn't understand why.  Why it hurts to pull herself up from the bed, or that she slips from her back legs going down stairs, or that she doesn't run, or needs help going upstairs.  

Than again, she could be wandering trying to figure out how to mooch more toast.  She's smart like that.

On my list of things to do is organize all the computer cords, so when she crawls under the desk, she can lean on me and I won't panic thinking everything will come unplugged.  Anything I can do  to make her feel better.  That's my job.

Murphy's day.